Wrap up

Ok, a little wrap up... I am going to take Geoff's and everyone else's advice, including even the Hyundai salesman, and I am looking for a used car.
I had my taxes done with free help from the AARP. It took ten minutes and was a pleasant and friendly experience. Here is the link for info in your area: https://locator.aarp.org/vmis/sites/tax_aide_locator.jsp

Snowy, snowy night...

It is midnight and I just got in from shoveling, getting a jumpstart on the morning, because we have very important early appointments. Yes, off to the hairdresser! Not rain, snow, sleet, or shine will cause the hairdresser to take us late or at an unscheduled time.


I wish you could all be me and have spent time at midnight in the snowstorm. It is so peaceful and dreamlike; I instantly felt the need to be as quiet as I could be to try to blend in with the night.


Instead of daytime shoveling, which is just a contest: Woman Vs. Snow - Don't shovel angry is my daytime motto. We seem to all be complaining because we have had so much this winter, but… This night, this snow, the time that I was just outside was incredible, it was bright out, not cold, and it was simply illusory.


All the dirty snow veiled under fresh powder for now, the air was moist, fresh, and comforting on my skin. After shoveling, I grabbed my camera so all could share what I saw with you and so I’ll remember, the peace, the urge to run upstairs and wake my daughter up to sit outside with me just to watch it float down from heaven until it lands, each flake reflecting a different star.
Good night and good vacation mojo from me to you.

Positivity

I have been a bit negative the past couple of days. How negative it is to feel sorry for oneself and to feel that circumstances are against you, which doesn’t get one anywhere, except down. Although hows and whys are not ours to always know, feeling like a victim of circumstances, or a victim of an old car whose time had come is useless. If everything happens for a reason and there is a higher power, than who knows why what happened happened, certainly not because I am a bad person, or to diminish me in any way.
Besides having to buy a car, being late for work was the worst part of it all because I want to make a good impression. Things happen; it is how we handle the things that matters and I should have called the school earlier, although I did call just in time.
In retrospect, things may not be as they seemed at all. Perhaps it's not just a coincidence that my motor blew up that afternoon; what if it was a way of getting me off the road the next day. Then I borrowed a car and was ready to get out on the road at the same time I am everyday anyway and G-d or the Universe (whichever term you chose) had to find another way to get me off the road.
Perhaps my motor exploding and the car locking itself while running were all part of some plan intended to help me, and I took it as a setback. It could be, as not all things are known to us, these things were sent to be a help. Interesting thought isn’t it… Have a spiritual day!
OMG Or, it never had anything to do with helping me, maybe I was going to crash into someone else that morning and the Universe was saving them. Which could be considering that the day before I spent and hour and a half getting a car insurance quote, but I didn't buy it. And well now there is no point. But maybe all of this happened so I didn't hit and hurt someone else...Hmmmm...

Taxes

Thank you J

I’m working on my taxes, second night in a row :(
I think I owe the government $37,000 the way I have it figured right now, or I have so many deductions I don't have any taxable income at all ;)
Screw it all - this year I’m runnin’ up to the Home Depot, I’m filing a WD40 and I’m done!
(After all, if it doesn’t squeak, don’t fix it.)

*I guarantee you all of the tax codes and worksheets are made by men. As American women if we made this, the directions would take a half a sheet of paper and would be easy to figure out. (Men making more for the same jobs would pay more.) And, of course clothes, shoes, hair products, make-up, and gas would all be deductible necessities. You would get an extra, "oh shit" bonus rebate for things like your car blowing up, serious hairdresser mistakes, child dumping grape juice on the new rug, and not having a pedicure or a massage in a year. College graduates would also get a "Congratulations, the US is so proud of you" bonus rebate upon graduation. I'm still looking for that line item, because the Hope Credit only works if you owe, what kind of joke is that?

Seriously? Universe R U kidding?

Unbelievable as it may sound this morning I went out to warm up the mechanic's car. When I went back to get in - all the doors were locked! What kind of a car does that? I know I didn’t hit the lock getting out and I know I unlocked all the doors with the little button thingy, yes I did because how did I get in… So here I am 6:45locked out of a running car. Unbelievable. Un be lee vvv a bb ll e !!! I called AAA, “Do you help people two days in a row who are apparently having a bad time?” She laughed. They sent the tow truck guy over to unlock the car, priority because the car was running. Turns out it was the same guy who towed my car yesterday, and priority means an hour. I was late for work, thank goodness it was a special day and just missed doing my homeroom, and they found someone to cover it for me at the last minute. Still though, I can’t stand being late, I haven’t been late yet all year until today. It just doesn’t look good.
***
I spoke to the mechanic this afternoon and it is really, really bad news so far. He will confirm it later. But he said there is oil running everywhere and he put two quarts in and it ran right out – So I need a head, which means a completely new motor, and a $1500, 1996 car is not worth putting a new motor in, especially since I put a new motor in three years ago. So now what, I can’t afford a new car. Do I get another $1500 car and take a chance, do I get a newer used car with a small payment, if I can. New car, used car, newer used car, old car, new car, used car, newer used car, old car, new car, used car, newer used car, old car, new car, used car, newer used car, old car… Ahhhhhhh

Todays Lesson: Leave the Keys With the Car!

Well, my car blew up today. Ok, didn’t blow up, exploded perhaps. Actually, when I saw my car I knew something was seriously wrong, just not how soon the car would actually self-destruct. My water pump was going, so in the morning I had filled up the antifreeze. When I reached my car in the parking lot at work, there was a neon green puddle five feet by five feet under my car. My first thought was, “Oh, shit, they are going to know it is me because we have assigned spaces. And that is a mess.” I got in and drove out; it’s not as if I could clean it up. My second thought was to make sure my water pump was on order. I had an appointment on Saturday to get it installed; I am trying to limp the old girl along for another year. I don’t want a car payment until I buy our dream house. Just so when I apply for a mortgage, I don’t have that much coming out if my check, you know. Anyway, I called my mechanic and left a message to remind him to order my water pump, and told him about the puddle. I just figured the puddle was a reminder to me to remind him. I drove about a half a mile more after I hung up and POP, like a huge booming pop sound. Less than a second after the tremendously loud pop, smoke was pouring out behind the car, then surrounding the passenger compartment, and then pouring out from the hood and into the car. It stunk like burning rubber. Luckily, there was a shoulder on the road, so I pulled right over, shut her off, grabbed my purse, and got the heck outta there. I thought it was on fire. I’ve overheated before but this was nothing like that, the amount of smoke was incredible. As I watched the car the smoke just dissipated. Thank goodness it wasn’t on fire. Then I remembered I had triple A. Remembering that the worry lifted a bit, I am so glad my father advised me to get that. I purchased it two months ago, right on-line for $60. I called my friend at school to see if he'd be driving by soon, and he asked a teacher who was coming by to pick me up and drive me home. thank you! When I got home I called the police to let them know where I left my car, and then I called triple A. It was so lovely, except being a novice and in a stress/panic mode; I didn’t know I had to leave the keys with the car. Oh Man! Duh. I should have thought of that! I finally got myself home out of the cold, and now needed to turn around and find a way back to the car and then home again. Grrrr. They wouldn’t come until the keys were in the car. Therefore, an hour later when my kindly friend had to pass my car on the way home, she dropped my key in it, and I called them back. They showed up about 45 minutes late. The first 5 miles of towing were free and then additional miles were only $3.00 per mile. The last time I had my car towed 2 miles it cost $120. In conclusion, today made my $60 worth it! So get AAA if you don’t have it, and wish me luck with the old car.

Can't sleep... musings

Here I am again, love is like sleep - elusive.

I can't sleep in this comfy bed, with my warm clean blankets and pillows, in my safe heated house. I am a queen. I am a rich queen. I am a grateful rich queen.

I wonder how many people died today...
I wonder how and why...
I wonder could their deaths have been avoided...
I wonder how many people are crying now because someone they loved died today...
I wonder how many kids will wake up tomorrow to find out a loved one is gone...

I hope nobody died today.
I hope nobody cries tomorrow.
I hope all children wake up with a smile.
I hope someone saves someone.
I hope I make a difference.

Africa

Aids epidemic
Food crisis
Racial tension
Intelligent uneducated
Compassion wanted
Aid needed

Better Batter

Let me just get this out right up front, in my house homemade cake means that we opened the box and added oil, eggs and water. Okay! Okay. With that being said, long ago I heard that to save some calories on the homemade cake you substitute applesauce for the oil. Well being oh so stuck in my ways I never tried it, until tonight. We made a pineapple upside down cake and used the applesauce instead of the oil and it was not only delicious, the cake was incredibly moist and sweet. I actually prefer it to the oil now that I’ve tried it.

In addition, a tip from my child, to make the upside down cake you need to put brown sugar in the bottom of the cake pan before the pineapple. Well, revealing how much sugar we use in this household, the brown sugar was a brick. I could have pounded in nails with it. I think it has been a good nine months since we used it. So while the college graduate is pounding the brown sugar around, beating on it with spatulas, knives and anything else, slamming it on to the cutting board; big blue eyes are watching and absorbing the motherly knowledge.
“Mom.” I hear.
“Yes dear,” in an aggravated tone.
“Didn’t you buy a grater this summer?”
“Yes, honey, I’m a little busy right now. Can’t you see what I’m...(pause) OOOHHH, will you pass that to me?” sweet as pie.
Worked like a charm! So there’s a tip, grate the brick of brown sugar, stop slamming around, and listen!
Well, as Paulo Freire said – teacher-learner and learner-teacher-we can never be one without the other. Hurrah.

I Can't Believe the Weekend is Over Already

For anyone who says that being a teacher is easy because we have so much time off and leave work early everyday, first of all isn’t getting up at the butt crack of dawn and driving to work in the dark. But no one knows. I get home from work and if I am not playing with my daughter, or doing only the necessary cleaning, I am still doing schoolwork. Now it is wonderful because I can enter grades online in an electronic grade book, check email, and do research for assignments online. Technology makes it easier to work at home, which helps me be a better mother. I can sit and spend time with my child while sitting on the computer and working. I love it and I am not complaining at all, but it is definitely a job that never ends. I had to go into work on Saturday this week to help a student and I will tell you I was not the only one. There we many of my dedicated coworkers there helping students as well.

The only reason I mention any of this is that my dear neighbor let me borrow a movie, R. Kelly’s Trapped in the Closet – Part 2. She loaned me this movie two weeks ago and here it is Sunday night of another week, and I still haven’t had time to watch this movie! It is definitely not a movie that can be on while my daughter is awake. The first movie was amazing, he sings the entire story as it is acted out and it is like six degrees of separation and coincidences all wrapped up into a hysterical story of revelation about whose with who, etc. It is not for those people who are easily offended, or don’t want to hear potty mouths, but it was funny. It was not a “mainstream” flick. The only thing I didn’t like was the use of the “n” word, even though it was just used between friends and not in a hateful way, I don’t think anyone should use it. It would be best if no one ever used the word again, so to keep it as part of the current vocabulary is wrong, it just promotes hate. I hope I get to see Part 2 this week, if not next week is school vacation. The good news is my lesson plans are done for the week and I am up to date on my grading of papers. C I promise I'll return the movie sometime this month!

Happy President's Day although we'll all be at work!